Really, OS X? REALLY??
You accuse me of misspelling “beans” and you COMPLETELY IGNORE “fulla”?
Out of outraged curiosity I right-clicked on “beans” to see how my computer thinks I should spell it, AND IT HAD NO SUGGESTIONS. If you’re going to call me out, at least have some suggestions on how to do it right.
What if I leave out the beer? Still good, do you think?
Oh, definitely. I’ve never made it without the beer, though. It adds a lot to the complexity and makes it more thin and soupy in the beginning to combine all the flavors. The moisture evaporating from it allows it to cook a long time to blend the flavors. If you don’t add beer, you might be able to keep it covered.
Any ideas on what to replace the beer with?
Current treat (I really like beans, OK?)
- Start with 28 oz. of baked kidney beans, 28 oz. of baked pinto beans with onions, and 21 oz. of black fiesta grillin’ beans in a crock pot
- 10 oz. of diced, sautéed onions
- One pound of sautéed sweet corn.
- About half of a 12 fl. oz. beer of your choice (drink the rest, duh)
- 8 oz. of pineapple tidbits in juice
- A healthy dollop of maple syrup
- A heaping tablespoon of brown sugar
- Lots of hot red pepper flakes (about twice as many as you think is appropriate)
- 7-10 big shakes of Chipotle Tabasco sauce
- Enough chipotle chile powder to make the top layer dry
- Mix together and set the crock pot on high
- Leave the cover off and stir often
- Cook for 4-6 hours to blend the flavors and thicken to taste
- Optional: Leave covered on “warm” for a few more hours to blend the flavors even more
It’s not nearly as spicy as you’d think. If you taste it while it cooks, it’ll be very spicy, but the spice eventually migrates into the beans and makes it milder. It’s also not as sweet as you’d think. The bitterness of the beer balances the maple syrup, brown sugar, and pineapple sweetness.
You’re left with a low-fat, high-fiber, hearty, delicious, and easily microwaveable meal or side-dish.
A few hours later: Weaponized butt.
I’m fulla beans.
It’s bean time!
- 9.8 pounds
- 4.5 quarts
- 34 servings
- 5,075 calories (149/serving)
- 395 fat calories (12/serving)
- 990 g total carbs (29 g/serving)
- 377 g sugar (11 g/serving)
- 163 g fiber (5 g/serving)
- 208 g protein (6 g/serving)
- 15,810 mg sodium (465 mg/serving)
- 100% yummy
I made a batch of beans using most of the cans below. (Hint: Not the tuna or soup.) The biggest proportion is Boston-baked red kidney beans. Next is “Grillin’” Southwest flavored black beans, then flavored regular baked beans.
- a can of crushed pineapple (including all the juice)
- Dinosaur hot sauce
- ground chipotle
- hot pepper flakes
- onion powder
- garlic powder
- real maple syrup
I cooked it down for a few hours so it would thicken and the flavors would meld. The hot stuff migrates into the beans and mellows out for a nice after-kick.
I added up all the labels and there are 36 servings. Oh, did I mention that my girlfriend doesn’t like beans?
Who wants to come over for a toot?