That's a big rooster.
- Merlin: You know I used to weigh thirty pounds more.
- Dan: Uhhh... How?
- Merlin: All cock.
PET PEEVE: This text is way too small. I can barely read it on the computer. When I see these comic book posts on my phone, they are completely illegible.
In the old days (When you could buy a house for a NICKEL! Get off my lawn!), the speech and thought bubbles were proportionate to the artwork. In this particular frame, there is plenty of room to expand the text. All it would cover up is grass.
What is the goddamn point of making it so fucking tiny? To co-opt the comic book culture’s own idiom: AAAGH!
Hot on the heels of Merlin and John’s excellent discussion of how dangerous bears are (Roderick on the Line #69 “Campfire Spaghetti Party”), I get this message on my answering machine today from the local police about a bear that’s been seen in my neighborhood. He even names my street.
A bear. In my neighborhood. ON MY STREET. GAH!
He goes on to say you should supervise children
that you like during outdoor activities, and if you encounter the bear, clap your hands or sing. What the hell? So, if the bear likes your singing, he won’t rip you to pieces? Is he the reincarnated Roger Ebert?
Well, to be fair, my singing would repel any fish, fur, or fowl.
Maybe the police should have suggested throwing a sneaker at him.
Girlfriend: I don’t know how they got so many famous people together in one place.
Me: It must be a Saturday Night Live thing.
GF: Yeah, since Lorne Greene is there.
Me: I think you’re thinking of Lorne Michaels.
GF: Who’s Lorne Greene then?
GF: Wait. Wasn’t Bonanza slapstick?
Me: I think you’re thinking of The Banana Splits.
This just came up in conversation (and Merlin’s post, alas, is broken) so, for your listening amazement, here it is again:
Freddie Mercury’s ‘WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY’ note in Under Pressure, a cappella
Merlin Mann - NICE!
Merlin’s pronunciation¹ of Walgreen’s Nice!™ brand reminds me of when I learned about factorials in math class. My friends and I shouted the number that the factorial function was to have been performed on. We had fun imagining staid mathematicians doing the same thing in conferences, studies, and libraries. Of course we got in trouble doing our math homework in the school library. As you do.
Also, NICE! is now my favorite ringtone.²
¹ Heard on Back to Work #81 at around 62:50
² Download the iPhone ringtone here
If you’re going to pump chili, you might as well dance and sing this song while you pump it. (And really, now that I said that, how can you not?) You may even get it for free.*
* It’s already free.